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Dan Phillips: Porn and Paper Pastors

Dan Phillips writes about a different sort of pornography problem:

Decades ago, I read a disturbingly candid essay by a pastor about his struggles with pornography. It was in Leadership magazine. Years later, two of his realizations still stand out to me.

The author came to see (as I recall) that he was attracted to these images because they were unreal. The women in the pictures never had bad days, were never crabby and demanding, never disrespectful and demeaning. No mood swings. They always suited his mood, his needs, his wants. They were unreal.

He came to see that he had no actual relationship with these women whatever. If (he named a female celebrity) had sat down next to him in an airplane, she wouldn’t know him from Adam. Whatever may have happened in his sinful fantasies, the two of them had no relationship in the real world.

Of course, this is why so many women resent actresses and models. It isn’t catty pettiness or smallness. It is that they know how visually-tempted men can be, and they know that they can’t compete with a fantasy — if their man is fool enough to chase one.

And they’re right, in a way. They can’t compete with these women. Because these women don’t exist in the real world! They may not even look like their pictures! Thanks to computer wizardry, the pictures we see may actually bear only the slightest resemblance to the actual women.

Nobody can compete with a fantasy.

And this post is not about pornography, men, women, nor marriage.

It is about people with paper pastors.

Read the rest here.

The Beauty of Leading a Flock to the Heavenly City

Can anything be more beautiful than leading the flock of God’s people towards the Heavenly City (Rev 22:1-6)? Won’t it be incredible to meet together before the throne of Christ? The central thought of our sermon on Sunday at The Red Brick Church per 1 Timothy 3:1 was that God’s plan for leadership in the local church is a noble or beautiful thing (listen here to the 4/21/13 sermon).

My vision is a pastor is to see our flock meet together on the other side! There can be no greater vision that to say, “Let’s meet in the presence of Christ, and let’s invite as many people as possible to come with us.” Those who have been around our church know that we talk about meeting at the 5th tree on the right side of the river.

Throughout the sermon we saw that the repeated New Testament emphasis on biblical elders cannot be missed (See Acts 14:23, Acts 20:17, Acts 20:28-31; Philippians 1:1; 1 Thess 5:12-13; 1 Timothy 3:1-7, 1 Timothy 4:3-14, 1 Timothy 5:17-25; Titus 1:5-9; Hebrews 13:7, 17; James 5:13-15; 1 Peter 5:1-5).

This coming Sunday we will consider the biblical qualifications for eldership. The below table compares qualifications from key New Testament passages.

Comparison of Elder Qualifications

Per Strauch, Biblical Leadership: An Urgent Call to Restore Biblical Church Leadership, pages  73-74

1 Timothy 3:2-7

Titus 1:6-9

1 Peter 5:1-3

  1. Above reproach
  2. The husband of one wife
  3. Temperate
  4. Prudent
  5. Respectable
  6. Hospitable
  7. Able to teach
  8. Not addicted to wine
  9. Not pugnacious*
  10. Gentle
  11. Uncontentious
  12. Free from the love of money
  13. Manages his household well
  14. Not a new convert
  15. A good reputation with those outside the church
  1. Above reproach
  2. The husband of one wife
  3. Having children who believe
  4. Not self-willed
  5. Not quick-tempered
  6. Not addicted to wine
  7. Not pugnacious*
  8. Not fond of sordid gain
  9. Hospitable
  10. Lover of what is good
  11. Sensible
  12. Just
  13. Devout
  14. Self-controlled
  15. Holds fast the faithful Word—both to exhort and to refute
  1. Not under compulsion but voluntary
  2. Not for sordid gain, but with eagerness
  3. Nor yet as lording it over . . . but proving to be examples

*Pugnacious: “Eager or quick to argue, quarrel, or fight.”

Thom Rainer: Four Simple Reasons Most Churches Aren’t Breakout Churches

Thom Rainer’s book, Breakout Churches, is recommended reading!

Almost a decade ago, I led a major study on churches that had reversed negative trends and become positive breakout churches. I established the criterion that the breakout had to take place without changing pastors. I knew from previous research that most breakout churches had new pastors. I wanted to see if it was likely for a church to turnaround without getting a new pastor.

My beginning database was 52,333 churches in the United States. Without boring you with all the details of my data screening and research (You can read about it in Appendix B of my book, Breakout Churches.), I was only able to identify 13 true breakout churches. For the interested statistical nerds like me, that’s only two 100ths of one percent (.0002).

That extremely low number has bothered me for years. As a result, I have attempted to discern what the primary hindrances are. Why is it so unlikely for a declining church to become a growing church? Surprisingly, demographics have little to do with the turnaround. So far, I’ve been able to identify four simple reasons breakout is hindered in most churches.

  1. Lack of leadership development. Most pastors have little training or background in leadership. But they are expected to lead a church. Some may have extensive theological and biblical training, but they are weak in leadership. Aaron had to tell Moses that his leadership approach was all wrong. Moses was headed for a leadership disaster. Many of our churches have leaders who have few leadership skills.
  2. Unbiblical understanding of church membership. I have written quite a bit on this topic lately, including my new book I Am a Church Member. . . .

Read the rest here.

 

Thom Rainer: 8 Most Frequent Preaching Distractions

On behalf of preachers everywhere, please click through and read the list. The first point on this list is easily the first on mine. But I would put #8 far higher.

Read the whole list here.

David Briggs: The Final Four, Travel Teams and Empty Pews: Who Is Winning the Competition Between Sports and Religion?

David Briggs considers the growing tension between church and sports:

The Rev. Stephen Fichter understood just how dominant a role sports has assumed in the culture when a family told him they would be out of town Good Friday to Easter Sunday to attend their child’s volleyball tournament.

“It’s truly sports that has become like the religion” for many people, said Fichter, a researcher and the pastor of Sacred Heart Church in Haworth, N.J.

From youth travel teams to big-time national festivals such as the Final Four, sports have been making increasing inroads in the busy lives of many Americans. Some scholars even trace the evolution of sports from pastime to a form of civil religion to now having become almost a folk religion.

And it is having an impact on religious groups, which report increasing difficulty convincing families that are willing to spend half a day traveling to a 9-year-old’s softball or soccer game to make time for worship services.

Read the rest here.

HT: David Murray

Chuck Lawless: Eight Diagnostic Question for a Church’s Health

I’m thinking about what kind of grades the Red Brick Church would receive in the following areas. They are by Chuck Lawless who is a church consultant:

I am a church consultant who loves helping God’s church. The churches I consult, though, aren’t always as excited, as a church consultation is sometimes like a medical physical—we know we need it, but we don’t like being poked and prodded by an outsider. Nevertheless, a good consultation prods with some important questions. Perhaps these questions will help you analyze your own church.

Is the church’s teaching based on the Bible? . . . 

Read the rest here.

So That All Might Hear Christ’s Gospel and Exalt Christ’s Glory

In recent months, no preacher has challenged me more about outreach and missions than David Platt. If you haven’t watched this sermon yet – - – do so soon! Excerpts from a recent interview of Platt include these quotes:

Have you ever met an unconverted believer? Or watched blood transform into Kool-Aid at church?

David Platt has. . .

And:

We must change the ways we’re praying, giving, and going so that all the peoples of the world might hear Christ’s gospel and exalt Christ’s glory. This won’t happen by simply creating a missions committee, taking a missions offering, or tacking a “missions week” onto our annual church calendar. This will happen when we infuse God’s zeal for his global glory—both in our neighborhoods and among all nations—into the very fabric of our churches on a weekly basis, calling persons to pray, give, and go with a special view to those who’ve never heard. Local ministry is totally necessary, no question. But global missions is tragically neglected. So we must give ourselves to both—and call all followers of Christ to give themselves to both. This is the only obedient response to a King who’s commanded us to make disciples of all nations.

Read the whole thing here.

The Best Part of Being a Pastor

CDB_9118Love is the best part.

Last week, our church gave me a birthday party  as I have now sojourned this earth these 50 years . . .

All the cards were great . . . notes like the one Elaine wrote (the pretty little girl to the right), remind me of the best part of being a pastor.

I put a copy of Elaine’s note below. I think we could come up with a verse for Elaine’s note; try John 13:34-35?

A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another. By this all people will know that you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.”John 13:34-35

*I haven’t found a Bible verse to explain the “meow” yet, but it’s a nice touch.

2013_03_16_15_41_57

First Round Winners in the Bound Together Quiz!

You can win one of several Nook e-readers or some great reading.First round winners for the Bound Together Quiz have just been providentially selected. (I use a random number generator in Excel to “draw” the winner).

Megan (I won’t include her last name) won a copy of Bound Together. . .

And Clayton (as in it’s not a bad idea if one of your deacons wins something) won a copy of Randy Pope’s book, Insourcing.

Congratulations! There are many more giveaways to come.

Local Churches and Christians Should Expect Conflict

Reposted and edited from an earlier date. If nothing else, read the quotes of Thom Rainer and others given below.

Somehow American Christians (I can’t speak for the rest of the world) believe that if they do everything right at church, there won’t be conflict.  I guess this is true, if everyone did everything right.

But, in a fallen world, the reality is the opposite.  When a local church really begins to follow Christ, then they can expect conflict.  It is certain.  In fact, a lack of conflict, may be a warning sign!

Still, when there is conflict some say, “Something is wrong – – we must not be headed in the right direction. . .” Of course, sometimes conflict is an indicator that leadership is making more decisions. But conflict does not necessarily mean that poor decisions are being made.

The Bible gives countless examples of how people who followed Christ faced conflict.  Reflect on the following verses:

After I go through Macedonia, I will come to you-for I will be going through Macedonia. Perhaps I will stay with you awhile, or even spend the winter, so that you can help me on my journey, wherever I go. I do not want to see you now and make only a passing visit; I hope to spend some time with you, if the Lord permits. But I will stay on at Ephesus until Pentecost, because a great door for effective work has opened to me, and there are many who oppose me (1 Corinthians 16:5-9).”

Keep watch over yourselves and all the flock of which the Holy Spirit has made you overseers. Be shepherds of the church of God, which he bought with his own blood. I know that after I leave, savage wolves will come in among you and will not spare the flock. Even from your own number men will arise and distort the truth in order to draw away disciples after them (Acts 20:28-30).

Dear friends, although I was very eager to write to you about the salvation we share, I felt I had to write and urge you to contend for the faith that was once for all entrusted to the saints. For certain men whose condemnation was written about long ago have secretly slipped in among you. They are godless men, who change the grace of our God into a license for immorality and deny Jesus Christ our only Sovereign and Lord. Though you already know all this, I want to remind you that the Lord delivered his people out of Egypt, but later destroyed those who did not believe (Jude 3-5).

But, dear friends, remember what the apostles of our Lord Jesus Christ foretold. They said to you, “In the last times there will be scoffers who will follow their own ungodly desires.” These are the men who divide you, who follow mere natural instincts and do not have the Spirit (Jude 17-19).

When Sanballat heard that we were rebuilding the wall, he became angry and was greatly incensed. He ridiculed the Jews, and in the presence of his associates and the army of Samaria, he said, “What are those feeble Jews doing? Will they restore their wall? Will they offer sacrifices? Will they finish in a day? Can they bring the stones back to life from those heaps of rubble-burned as they are?” Tobiah the Ammonite, who was at his side, said, “What they are building-if even a fox climbed up on it, he would break down their wall of stones!” Hear us, O our God, for we are despised. Turn their insults back on their own heads. Give them over as plunder in a land of captivity (Nehemiah 4:1-4).

And, consider these quotes:

“Over time and through hundreds of conversations we came to recognize that change does not happen without conflict.  As we reviewed the biblical patterns, every time – – without exception – – the people of God began to make adjustments to join God in his activity, conflict emerged.” [1]  Leading Congregational Change: A Practical Guide for the Transformational Journey

“As one pastor said, ‘All my life, I’ve judged my success by how happy everyone in the church was.  You are telling me that if I’m really on mission with God, one sign of my success will be the presence of conflict.’” [2]Leading Congregational Change: A Practical Guide for the Transformational Journey

By this point in the book, you may be greatly inspired by the numerous stories of leaders who persevered in the midst of significant trials. On the other hand, you may be scared to death by the high cost these leaders paid to move their churches to new levels of excellence. You have already read of leaders who were dismissed, stressed-out leaders who found themselves in the hospital, and leaders who faced the wrath of those who were once supporters. Unfortunately, difficulties are commonplace in churches that move to greatness. Sometimes moments of crisis are sensed internally by those who lead the change in the church. Inevitably the crisis also takes place with many of the members. And more often than not, the members who experience the crisis blame the pastor for the difficulties they encounter. [3] Thom Rainer.

Second, virtually every leader in Scripture endured some type of conflict in his or her life. The cost of following Christ is great. We cannot become complacent with the status quo just to avoid conflict. We must lead. Yes, we must love the people, and we must console them when change becomes increasingly painful to them. But we must lead. We cannot be content with a life and a ministry that could be described in the epitaph: ”This leader avoided conflict well.” [4] Thom Rainer.

But the greatest surprise was to hear of the cost of breaking out. My bias did not want this factor to be included in the study. I feared that describing the high price churches and leaders paid when they moved to greatness would deter and discourage others from taking this path.[5]  Thom Rainer

Perhaps the most significant lesson of all, though, was the realization that when you strip it all away, leaders do just two things: They create conflict and they resolve conflict. . . It’s not hyperbole.  Leaders create conflict simply by pushing people to focus on God’s vision.  That creates conflict for most people, because his vision is designed to cause change in our lives – – and most people resist change.[6]  George Barna.

It is concluded that every congregation that successfully adapted and flourished in a changing community had a substantial church fight.  Those that chose to avoid conflict at all costs failed to flourish.  No exceptions.[7]  Gene Wood.

Don’t be surprised by painful trials (1 Peter 4:12ff); fix your eyes on the Lord (Heb 12:1-3).  It is worth it!


[1] Jim Herrington and others, Leading Congregational Change: A Practical Guide for the Transformational Journey (San Francisco: Jossey-Bass Publishers, 2000), 8.[2] Ibid., 8.

[3] Thom S. Rainer, Breakout Churches: Discover How to Make the Leap (Grand Rapids: Zondervan, 2005), 86.

[4] Ibid., 87.

[5] Ibid., 208.

[6] George Barna, A Fish out of Water: 9 Strategies Effective Leaders Use to Help You Get Back into the Flow (Nashville: Integrity Publishers, 2002), 139.

[7] Gene Wood, Leading Turnaround Churches (St. Charles, IL: Churchsmart Resources, 2001), 37.

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