Statement #8. There are times when it is wrong to forgive. TRUE.
(As mentioned on question #4, you can go to this blog to read the quotes of other pastors and theologians about whether or not forgiveness is conditional).
Some argue that it is never wrong to forgive. But this cannot be the case. As, I explain in Chapter 3, God does not forgive the unrepentant. It would be wrong for him to do so because it would go against his own justice and holiness.
Others counter that while there may be times when God does not forgive, people must always forgive. They insist that whenever a wrong is committed, regardless of whether or not the offender is repentant, Christians should “automatically” forgive the offender. But, this teaching is too simplistic. It encourages forgiveness so broadly that it diminishes the justice of God and compromises the integrity of true forgiveness. This is what Dennis Prager pointed out in a Wall Street Journal article:
The bodies of the three teen-age girls shot dead last December by a fellow student at Heath High School in West Paducah, Ky., were not yet cold before some of their schoolmates hung a sign announcing, “We forgive you, Mike!” They were referring to Michael Carneal, 14, the killer.
This immediate and automatic forgiveness is not surprising. Over the past generation, many Christians have adopted the idea that they should forgive everyone who commits evil against anyone, no matter how great and cruel and whether or not the evildoer repents.
The number of examples is almost as large as the number of heinous crimes. Last August, for instance, the preacher at a Martha’s Vineyard church service attended by the vacationing President Clinton announced that the duty of all Christians was to forgive Timothy McVeigh, the Oklahoma City bomber who murdered 168 Americans. “Can each of you look at a picture of Timothy McVeigh and forgive him?” the Rev. John Miller asked. “I have, and I invite you to do the same.”
Though I am a Jew, I believe that a vibrant Christianity is essential if America’s moral decline is to be reversed. And despite theological differences, Christianity and Judaism have served as the bedrock of American civilization. And I am appalled and frightened by this feel-good doctrine of automatic forgiveness.
This book will interact with Prager’s legitimate concern. It will present the beauty of God’s grace and the necessity of forgiveness. But it will also teach the reader that forgiveness must take place in a way that is consistent with justice. We must move beyond a “feel-good doctrine of automatic forgiveness.” Christians must always have a willingness to forgive or an attitude of forgiveness. But, this does not mean that forgiveness always takes place.
Chapters 11-12 focus entirely on this area. If you have been deeply hurt, and the other person is not sorry about it, read these chapters. If you wonder how Christians should respond to the Holocaust, 9/11, Columbine, Oklahoma City, Virginia Tech, or Rwanda, then read chapters 11-12.
in answer to why you say your willingness to forgive determines if you go to heaven, you imply if you do not forgive all wrongs, you will be denied entrance to heaven. But in the answer to whether there are times you should not forgive you say there are. How can it be both? I realize we are to forgive others because we have been forgiven. Thankfully, I have never been wronged so greatly I could not forgive. I believe, though, that when we are forgiven and saved to heaven, it is a done deal. We are to live for Christ and to repent. But if I die and have not forgiven a person, I do not believe God will condemn me to hell. 1 John 1:9. I have not read your book, came across your blog and took test. Thanks for blog on Casey Anthony, it was soothing for me. God bless.
Sheri, that’s a great question on your part. Christians are called to always be gracious, always to have an attitude of forgiveness. But forgiveness takes place in its fullest sense when the other person is repentant and the relationship is restored.
The person who is unwilling to forgive may betray the position of the unforgiving servant in Matt 18:21-35. That person should question whether or not he or she is regenerate because it is characteristic of the forgiven that they are willing to forgive.
Quacking doesn’t make you a duck, but ducks quack. Forgiving doesn’t make you a Christian, but Christians are willing to forgive.
Does that make sense?